A Mental Note
by the X smashley
Summary: One Shot Fic: Don't waste time when you're in love. Don't take it for granted. Don't second guess. Don't automatically assume. 99 percent of the time, you're wrong as was she when it concerned her relationship with John Cena. But will she learn? Cena/OC


**Title: A Mental Note  
Rating: R  
Warnings: Language mostly.  
Characters: John Cena/OC (appearances by others, of course. This is the WWE after all.)  
Disclaimer: I own nothing but my OC- who will remain nameless. (It's my trademark, deal. heh.)  
Summary: Don't waste time when you love someone-- don't take it for granted, don't second-guess and don't automatically assume. 99 of the time, you're completely wrong-- as was she when it concerned her relationship with one, John Cena. But will she learn the error of her ways?**

* * *

**John's POV**

I drug my body up the ramp, my legs seriously felt like that could go any minute; like I was walking on jelly... I felt like I had been hit with a damn 18-wheeler truck and in a weird way, I had been. A truck who happened to be my best friend; Randy Orton. We tore the house down and I was damn sure proud of that but along with that my body was tore down as well; it was worth it, no doubt.

I finally looked back, seeing the 80,103 fans staring back at me. I knew close to 40,051 hated me but whatever, I was still WWE Champion damnit. I knew the people out there riding with me, out did the number of people that had turned against me. I've had people like that against me my entire life so that is nothing new to me. It's just another day.

I had just beat the hell out of Orton, if only to have him return the favor, ten fold. I had a numbing pain in my leg, but as soon as Lilian announced my name as the winner and I heard my music over the sound system at Ford Field I had that same numbing feeling everywhere. I still couldn't believe it, me, John Cena, the punk kid from the _"mean"_ streets of West Newberry, Massachusetts, WWE Champion, headlining yet another WWE PPV.

When I looked back into that camera, pointed, and told my dad I had done it all for him the realization hit me that I was really living my dream; everything I had ever wanted as a kid had come true at that very moment. I was working for the WWE, as their WWE Champion, for almost a year; I had created a rap album, a movie and had accomplished countless other things because of my wrestling name-to-fame. But the most important part, I had made my old man proud and that made me damn proud to be a born and breed Cena boy.

* * *

As soon as I hit the gorilla position, safely behind the curtain-- the congratulations came pouring in, as they always did after a hard fought show but for some reason, this time it seemed like something more. Road agents slapping my back like proud fathers, shaking my hand, the works. I even had Linda McMahon sitting there like the lovly woman she is nodding her head in approval. I just passed a weak smile, and nodded a bit in response; that's all I had the energy for. My eyes then locked across the room as I noticed Randy standing in the corner, watching me walk back to the back, a little bit of a limp in my step, thanks to him. I finally cornered him, looking him directly in the eye with nothing but respect; sweat pouring down both our bodies, bloody, battered and tired as hell. 

"Thanks man... I owe you." I reached out my hand as he looked at me a minute. He slowly started to nod as he grabbed a hold of my hand, shaking it firmly.

"Thank _you_ Cena.. you kicked my ass, and _you_ deserve that belt. You damn sure just proved it to all those marks out there." Being my friend, Randy knew how much shit I have been through over my time in the WWE. Whether the people were loving or hating me it was always something. Hearing the respect he was giving me almost overwhelmed me; we were all hard-ass men around here but we all understood exactly what it meant to be respected by your peers.

I gave him a stiff nod back as I continued on down the stairs, slowly taking my time. I was pretty sure my leg wasn't completely injured, it just didn't feel like a million bucks right now either. I didn't feel like taking my chances with EMTS or the trainers tonight so I was damn sure trying to tough it out. I wasn't in the mood to have people smothering me, not to mention I was still a little out of it from the match I had just finished. I'm pretty sure there's a few moments of action I don't remember, I could have blacked out more than once.

I hobbled around the corner towards the locker rooms before I finally looked up; I got the sudden feeling that I was being watched. My eyes instantly attached directly to her deep brown ones. It was obvious they were glistening with tears. She stood in front of a monitor, my guess being was she had just finished watching my match herself. Her arms were crossed over her chest, one hand up against her face like she was holding her nose in the right place or something. She did that almost every time she got emotional over my matches. I sent her a easy smile as I walked the rest of the way up to her, watching as a few tears finally slide down her wine-colored cheeks.

She was wearing my sweatshirt; it was black with a white Michelle & Ness logo on the front. She had the sleeves pulled down over her hands, gripping the ends in her small fists. She was always stealing it for 'being cold.' It didn't even matter that I was wearing it the seven times outta ten that she asked for it. But I guess I would be cold all the time too if I wore those little outfits that the Divas wore. Half the time if she wore a wash cloth it would have been more material.

She was still wearing the same light colored blue jean skirt and sliver heels from earlier so I suppose she was still wearing the same low-cut, sleeveless top as well; which has to have been the reason for her being cold at a time like this. Her hair was dolled up, her make-up to absolutely perfection, even though I kept telling her she didn't need it she wouldn't believe me. Pay-per-view events brought out the best in everyone, especially her. She always cleaned up damn good, and since she wasn't part of the Divas match that night she was one of the only ones left who still looked half way decent. But nothing, absolutely nothing could have compared to the dress she wore to dinner last night. God, she was beautiful but I was still pissed at that waiter for spilling that water on her. She should have been just as angry as I was-- if not more so but that's not the kind of person she was. My girlfriend was the sweetest, most chill, geniun person I have ever met in my entire life. I couldn't imagine myself without her; I honestly believe she's my better half.

Her black eyeliner was starting to spread out under her eyes as I studied her face. Even though she had been crying, she couldn't have looked more beautiful. She was watching me closely, but only for a second before starting to speak. "Your match was... amazing." She whispered, sniffing a little, wiping at her nose. "I'm very proud of you." Instantly, I was complete putty in her hands when she spoke, especially when it concerned things like this; things that meant a hell of a lot more to me than people realized because of what kind of person they _thought_ I was.

Her distinct accent is one of the first things I noticed about her the first time I met her, that, and her gorgeous eyes. But she knows me, she knows how much it means to me to know that she's proud of me. She completely tore my heartstrings out during moments like these. Most times I wished she wouldn't get so emotional over what happened to me in the ring, but I couldn't blame her this time. Hell, I was even tearing up out there myself. _It just meant that much._

"Thanks dollface," I smiled, watching her return the favor the best she could at the moment. That's something I couldn't live without... she smiled every single time I used that stupid nickname I made up on a spur-of-the-moment thing one night we were out in Chicago.

I flung the champion off my shoulder, holding it down at my side. She instantly pushed forward, locking her arms around my neck, burying her face in my neck. She was the only girl I have ever been involved with that would willing touch me after a match. No matter how much blood, sweat, whatever... she was never afraid to touch me.

I wrapped my left arm around her waist burying my face in her hair, getting lost in the smell of her shampoo. I could never remember the name of it but it intoxicated me as good as any Jagermeister would.

"Are you okay?" She whispered against my skin, lightly pressing her lips to the same spot were her hot breath had just been. I nodded a bit, but nothing more. I didn't want to move away from her yet.

"Yeah... I'm fine." She gently pulled back a little, looking up at me.

"Are you sure?" She whispered again, I smiled weakly. I loved the look in her eyes.

"Yeah, I'm sure. My leg is a little sore, and I'm sure I'll have a headache from hell in the morning but as of right now.. I couldn't be better." She returned the smile, brushing her hand against my jaw bone, down to my chin. She gently touched her lips to mine, pulling away quickly. It wasn't a kiss, I would hardly even call it a peck. It was just meant for me to know she was doing pretty good too, obviously and she would always be there for me, no matter what.

She pulled herself to my left side, pulling my arm over her shoulder, wrapping her right arm around my waist. I smiled down at her as she started to carefully walk me down the hallway towards the men's locker room. "Come on Champ," she said as she tried to lighten the mood, smirking as she paced our steps to make sure they were in sync.

"I don't think I'm _that_ injured ya know," I laughed, watching her bat her eyelashes at me.

"What? Are you trying to say you don't want me to take care of you?... That you're not in the mood for me to rub my body up against your body to help take that.. _strain_ away?" She smirked, cocking her eyebrow up at me. I grinned, lacing my fingers with hers as they fell around her shoulder.

"I'm definitely not saying that.." I chuckled, watching her eyes and trying to walk steady at the same time. "I'm always in the _mood _for that." She sarcastically shook her head, rolling her eyes at me as we hobbled up onto the locker room door. I dropped my arm off of her, pushing the door open a little. I left a slight tap on my ass as I faced her, eyeing her up and down.

"Shower, cause you reek of blood, sweat, and Orton. Make sure you get at least a band-aid for that gash on the back of your head, cause I'm not taking care of your lazy ass tonight. Oh, and make sure you hurry, I'm definitely ready to get back to the hotel." I passed a slight laugh by my lips, shaking my head.

"Damn, pushy much? What happened to the _'aw, poor baby; let me take care of you and baby you on your big night'_ girlfriend, that I love so much?" I asked, watching her smile and laugh a little in response.

"She left with the _'nice'_ Divas," she said, using air quotes. "All they left you with was the straight-up bitchy Diva who doesn't give a damn... But I said I wasn't taking care or your ass, I didn't say I wasn't going to _get some _of it." I busted out laughing, smiling till my dimples hurt.

"I'll meet you in catering in 15 minutes," I breathed, walking into the locker room as she walked off towards the womens locker room. I swear... she was too much sometimes. But I liked it that way, a little _too_ much at times.

* * *

**Her POV**

I pushed open the door to the Divas locker room and as usual, all the girls were sitting around chatting non-stop, a mile a minute. I shook my head, going straight over to my bags, throwing all my stuff in as quickly as I could get it there. I wasn't in the mood to get technical about the details. I just wanted to get my shit and go basically, especially when I knew John would be waiting for me.

"And just where are you going in such a hurry?" A voice piped up from behind me suddenly, but I smiled, turning around since I instantly knew who it was.

"Where do you think I'm going Vicky? I'm getting the hell outta dodge as Tazz would say." She laughed back, shaking her head at me as she crossed her arms over her chest.

"Uh huh, getting the hell outta dodge huh? Would you happen to be leaving with a certain Cena?" I rolled my eyes, throwing a balled up t-shirt at her as she threw up her hands in front of her face to block my shot.

"Of course, why wouldn't I leave with my boyfriend?" She smirked, suddenly trying to act all innocent, I could tell. Which anyone who knew Victoria knew that wasn't her at all, she was a total sham.

"Ohhh I dunno... I thought you might want to come out to the Diva Madness PPV celebration. We're going to this club downtown called '21.' They're closing down for the night just to host us and some of the boys. You and Cena should come." I nodded, acting like I was actually trying to process the thought of John going out any where to party and drink the night away, especially after a match like that.

"Were you watching the main event?" I asked, watching her shake her head yes as her hands went to her hips.

"Alright then, do you actually think John's gunna want to go out and party all night after that?" She eyed me, almost as if she thought it was a stupid question. I know John has a repuation for being the guy that's out till 4AM but honestly, not tonight.

"There will be alcohol you know?" She stated, matter-of-factly. "We all know how big of a drinker that boy is." I shrugged, that much was true. He drank a little too much sometimes but I was trying to calm him down as much as I could. He gets himself in a lot of shit when he's drunk. I couldn't count on two hands how many times he had hit some random guy because 'the drunk John' thought that they were trying to hit on me.

"You're right about that, but I'm not going to promise anything. I'm meeting him in catering in a few so I'll drop the question. If he wants to go, we'll be there. If he doesn't, I'll see you tomorrow." I smirked, pulling my purse up on my shoulder, over John's huge sweatshirt. I zipped my suitcase, sitting it down on the floor, pulling the handle up. I looked back at Victoria, who was now just staring at me.

"What?" I asked, confusion on my face. "Is there Cena sweat on me or something?" I asked again, laughing a little.

"No no... it's not that; well, there probably is Cena sweat on you but that's not what I was watching... I just happened to notice how happy you looked, the smile on your face... the extra, extra, extra large sweatshirt you happen to be wearing." She genuinely smiled at me, as I sighed contently. I mentally pictured John's gorgeous smile and amazing body in my head... the sweatshirt no where in sight.

"Yeah, a lot has changed in a short period of time, hasn't it? I owe Cena a lot for putting up with my ass, he deserves a whole different kind of title belt for that." She laughed again, standing to face me as I was getting ready to finally leave to go find said Cena.

"He really cares about you, I know it. And you obviously care a lot about him. I know how much hell you've went through with past relationships and... well, I'm sure you know what I'm trying to say. I just really wanted to let you know that it shows, and it's oh-so obvious that you _love_ him. But I was just wondering... have you told him that yet?" I swallowed hard, trying to focus on the question. I uneasily bit my lip, looking anywhere but at her now, aimlessly searching the room around me.

"No.. not yet," I breathed, trying to picture the scenario in my head. Vicky sighed at me, shaking her head at me again, this time with a more disappointed and disapproving mannerism.

"And why the hell not? It's been 3 months. It's obvious to everyone around her, just tell him hunnie. It may not seem like it, but it's important to both of you, and your relationship. I'm older, I know more and I'm telling you-- I've been there, done that. If you can't base a relationship off of love, trust and honesty, it isn't anything but sex."

"What's wrong with that?" I asked, trying to resurface her mind to some other topic of conversation. I should of known she wouldn't take the bait, even if the topic was sex with a Greek god like John; who not to mention was great in the sack.

"You of all people don't want a relationship of just sex, even if it is with that Greek god of a man." I sighed. How as it she always knew what I was thinking? "You've got to tell him, you might be surprised." I crossed my arms over my chest this time, looking back at her again.

"Yeah, I'll be pleasantly surprised when he dumps my ass out on the doorstep after I tell him I'm in love with him... We all know John's not the type to express his feelings or emotions, especially since everything that happened with his ex, Liz. You and I both know I love being around him, and I happy being his girlfriend.. I don't want all that to go away if I were to tell him and then he dumps me. I couldn't handle something like that again... not after all the deadbeats I've dealt with." She sighed, her eyes softening at the mention of my past. Vicky was my closest Diva friend since Trish and Amy left a little over a year ago so I talked to her a lot about everything I was going through. She shook her head at me slightly.

"John would never do that, and you know it. He isn't like most guys; he may be tougher than hell in that ring but when it comes to females he's as soft as it gets. Ever since his break up with Liz I watched him night after night get drunk at the bars and clubs we went to after our shows and take any random ring-rat he could find back to his hotel room. That isn't the man he wants to be, no matter what anyone thinks about him. No one wants to live the single life forever, especially when you're sleeping with anything that moves as much as you can possibly get it. I've heard John say more than once that he would never get in a serious relationship again when some of the boys and even some of us Divas asked him about his ring-rat problem; all because of what that bitch did to him. Hell, I even tired to talk him into finding someone. His response was always the same-- _'I'm not getting serious with a girl again. I'm not doing that to myself again.' _He promised himself that over and over again until I honestly got tried of hearing it."

I started to bite my lip again, shifting my eyes to the ground, sighing heavly again. "I know that..." I whispered. There wasn't too much else to say; it was all completely true.

"But," she continued, "when a group of us went down to that OVW show and he first laid eyes on you I thought he was going to have a spaz heart attack... God, he would probably kill me if he knew I was telling you all this but I think you should know... He saw you in the ring wrestling Beth and he grabs up Al Snow, and pulls him to the curtain. He stared at you a second while you pulled off a picture perfect springboard moonsault. He finally looked over at Al and said, _"who is that girl? Not Beth, but the other one. Who is she?"_ Al smiled like a proud father, as he watched you in the ring and talked to Cena at the same time. I just stood back in the shadows a little bit with Torrie, watching the whole thing unfolding in front of our eyes. We both knew right then what John was thinking-- and sometimes I still don't believe it."

"Al put his arm around John, pulling him a little closer; I almost couldn't hear what they were saying but I think Al knew we were ease-dropping on them. _'That would be our third year Diva, we signed her to a deal in 2003 and she's been here ever since. She's progressed strongly over the years. I hear the office is thinking about signing her to Raw pretty soon.'_ He told him; Torrie and I had to keep from letting out a giant '_AWW_' at the mere look on John's face when Al said that you would be on Raw. He was totally fixated on you from the moment he saw you... Then the next thing I knew y'all were talking backstage and... well, you know the rest."

I felt my eyes water up as I looked back up at her, taking my hands down from my chest. "You really think I should tell him?" I asked, a small frown on my face. She smiled a little, nodding her head. Vic was full of knowledge, she can be a total goof sometimes yes, but I swear I learn something new from her every single day.

"Yes, I really do. I saw the fireworks between you and John, I've seen them from day one-- we all have. You should hear the boys talk about you and John when you're not around. We all believe in you guys... We think you're finally going to be the one to break John back into wanting a relationship, marriage... _children_. You've already broke him into a boyfriend/girlfriend status, that's gotta tell you something." I felt my lips curve into a small smile at the thought of all those huge wrestlers I had watched since I was a kid actually talking about me and my relationships behind my back. It was weird how things worked out sometimes. They all looked after me like a father, or a big brother would. These people definitely were my family that's for sure.

I walked up to Victoria then, wrapping my arms around her for a hug, squeezing lightly. "Thanks Vic, I don't know how you know exactly what I need to hear for you to get your way but it magically works every single time." She pulled back, laughing a little.

"That's a good thing, I promise. I was this close to calling Trishers and Ames and telling them to three-way you and get on your ass about this." She shot back, holding up her index and middle fingers showing just how close she really was, and that she meant business about it.

With the mention of a phone call I quickly pulled out my cell phone, looking at the time. I grabbed my suitcase handle and pulled it behind me. "I gotta go! I was supposed to meet him ten minutes ago. You know how he gets when I'm late. Heaven forbid he call the National Guard for a search party." I chuckled to myself as I was about half way to the door when I heard her start again.

"It's only because he loves you," she answered. I felt my cheeks instantly blush over. I turned around again; a smile I couldn't help etched on my face. "Call me tomorrow with all the juicy details will ya?" She finished, before I had a chance to say anything else. I laughed a little, slowly nodding my head that I would.

I was just about to turn and continue on my way out the door when I heard a handful of new voices come up from behind me causing me to stop yet again.

"And me..." Torrie smirked. I should have known they would be ease-dropping; we all do it, it's a Diva speciality.

"Oh, you know you better be calling me," Mickie threatened with a smile. I definitely knew if I didn't call her, she'd have my ass the next day for sure."And, if you definitely don't call me-- I'll kick your ass myself, no holds barred." Okay, so maybe I didn't feel as threatened when Maria said stuff like that but I'd humor her anyway."You better put us all on speed dial." Candice shook her finger at me as her eyes narrowed, proving she meant business; or, Ms. Michelle business as we liked to call it.

"I _better_ get the call, as well." Melina piped in, that signature glare in her eye.

I rolled my eyes, kicking my suitcase out the door with the heel of my shoe. "Alright, alright! This concludes the personal information hour of the pay-per-view tonight girls... I'll either call y'all tomorrow morning or we'll talk tomorrow afternoon at the next arena, ok?" I heard them all squeal in Diva delight as I finally exited the room.

Checking the time on my cell phone again yet again I started to nerviously bite at my bottom lip. _Damnit..._ I was now a good 20 minutes late, John was definitely going to have a conniption-- I could see it now.

I finally walked into catering just as I heard John's voice say he was going to go look for me. I smiled, loving the fact he was that worried about me. Pulling my bag up to him, I tossed my hair over my shoulder.

"No need, I'm right here. Vic, and the rest of the Raw ladies got me side-tracked with some girly-gossip, sorry I'm late." I watched his gorgeous dimples pop up on his face again as he looked at me-- I could see the relief in his eyes.

He stood there surrounded by Matt and Jeff Hardy, Ken Kennedy, Randy Orton and my favorite blonde Canadian, Adam Copeland. I tore my eyes away from John's to look towards them; instantly noticing the tired look on all of their faces, I don't know how any of them could go out and party tonight. They had went through hell too with their matches-- it was one of the best pay-per-views I had witnessed in a long time.

"Oh, okay." John started, as my eyes focused back on him. "That explains it all." I rolled my eyes at his tone, slapping him in the side of the arm playfully. He was already showered, dressed, packed and ready to go; I felt bad for keeping him waiting longer than I should have. I knew how tired he was.

"Shut up John, geezus.." I looked back over to the rest of the guys then, smiling extra big pretending to ignore John for the moment. "That was some amazing matches out there tonight guys. A night for the record books, no doubt... How's your back Jeff? That missed Swanton looked pretty sick from the back." His hand instinctively went to his lower back, holding his hand against it.

"Oh, it's okay. I mean, I'm still in one piece so I can't complain, right?" As if Jeff ever complained about anything, that man didn't have a care or a true enemy in the world; I admired his carefree spirit the most, I guess that's why I was so attracted to John-- aside from him being completely gorgeous.

Before I could even get a word out to reply to Jeff's ode to good health, another blonde piped up, interjecting into the conversation between myself and the techin-colored Hardy brother.

"Well, I personally think I took the worst of it tonight." Ken chimed in, looking down at the ground _trying_ to act innocent. I laughed, a little on the sarcastic side as I eyed him expectingly.

"I wonder why that is…" I replied, my cluelessness as fake as his innocense. My eyes wondered as I looked back over at John to see him staring at me, a small sparkle in his blue eyes. The absolutely gorgeous blue eyes that I got lost in every night before I fell asleep; something I wouldn't change for the world, much less ever what to live without. I sent him a half smile, feeling his hand slip into mine, holding it gently. My heart jumped, butterflies filling my stomach as the smile on my face got a little cheesier. I always felt like I was in high-school again when he touched me, or just around me in general. Everyday felt like a new chapter to the world's biggest school-girl crush.

"Well, boys, we're headed out for the night. My poor whittle baby here is all tuckered out." I eyed John out of the corner of my eye as I snickered with the rest of the guys at my suddenly childish accent. He crossed his arms over his chest, his black Nike bag hanging over his shoulder; my hand instantly missing the touch and feel on his own when he released me.

He looked at me with that _'you have about 10-seconds to cut the crap or I'm leaving your ass at the arena'_ face he likes to use on me and I playfully swatted at him with my hand knowing he was all bark and no bite.

"Alright, alright! Grumpy butt over here is ready to go... Later guys!" I waved to them, as I returned a hand to the handle of my suitcase. Before I could even turn around I felt John pulling me out of catering as he took my opposite hand back into his own.

We were almost half way to the parking lot before he slowed down, his limp had gone down considerably with his hot shower which I was thankful for; he didn't need a serious injury right now to say the least.

"Damn baby, you're gunna pull my arm outta the socket if you don't stop dragging me around like that." I laughed, watching his pace finally slow completely to a normal walk about the time we hit the pavement of the parking deck. He drug the keys to the rental out of the pocket of his jean shorts with the opposite hand from the one that held me with.

We walked up to the SUV, as he popped the trunk. Releasing my hand easily to throw his huge back in the back. I transferred the handle of my suitcase into his hand as he popped it back down into it's original place and picked the whole thing up and laid in in the back as well. It looked like his back might have given him a little trouble in the lift but I didn't say anything. He had just had a litteral kick-ass match for Christ sakes-- I wasn't about to bug him... Besides, I still had that lovely issue Vicky brought up earlier on my mind to occupy me. Actually, I couldn't think about much of anything else.

"Baby… _baby_, hello! Earth to Mars, do you copy?" I snapped out of my thoughts to see John staring back at me with a blank expression on his face; I could always tell what he was thinking, but I wasn't about to explain to him what was on my mind right here, right now. This wasn't the time, nor the place to have a conversation like that.

"What?" I asked. I couldn't even try to pretend I had been paying enough attention to hear what he had said while I was dwelling on… _other things._

"I asked what the hell were you carrying in that suitcase, bricks? That's about as heavy as my bag and it has a thirty pound Championship belt included." He laughed, walking around the side of the vehicle to open up the passenger door for me like the true gentleman I had found him to be.

I tucked a piece of hair behind my ear as I passed him, a small smile on my face as the intoxicating scent of his Axe bodyspray filled my senses. Slipping my hand behind me to smooth out my mini skirt, I carefully slide into the seat.

"Aww, damnit... Why'd you have to go and get in that like?" I instantly rolled my eyes at him again, shaking my head disappovingly; but, I couldn't help but small at his some-what preverted ways.

"There aren't going to be any sneak-peeks tonight Cena, now get your ass in the car... You're sucha perv." I smirked up at him, giving a seductive look for a moment just to make him wish even more he'd gotten the peek; I definitely loved pulling his chain.

"But," I continued some-what arrogantly. "If you play your cards right… you just might get to be in another main event tonight... only this time, it will be no disqualifications." The smile on his face instantly got bigger, as he hurriedly slammed my door, running around the car like he was a wild little 8-year-old again. I giggled, watching him jump in the drivers seat, plugging the key in the ignition as fast as he could get it there.

"Say no more, dollface. You have my attention." I laughed along with him this time as he pulled out of the parking space. I took it upon myself, as I often did, to flip on the radio. I turned the volume up just a tad so I could hear both the music and talk to John at the same time, as always.

"So, all I have to do is talk about the _possibility_ of sex and you automatically go about everything at the humanly unnatural speed of light?" I asked, watching him look over at me. He took his right hand off the wheel to reach down to the edge of my seat, laying his hand over the top of mine.

"Any possibility with you, is a good possibility." He chuckled, slowing the vechicle to stop at a red light. My jaw dropped a little, fake shock on my face. He was damn right and I knew it-- I was a nothing short of a damn nympho when it came to giving him what he wanted... but, then again, he didn't really have to say it like that. It made me sound like one of those ring-rats that hang out after the shows.

"Cena, are you calling me a skank?" I asked, trying to make it out like I was as serious as a heart attack-- but I was really only half-joking with him. He quickly shot me a look, then refocused his eyes on the road when the light finally faded to green.

A cocky Orton-ish smirk faded across his face as he drove down the city streets of Atlanta. "Hell no! You know I would never call you a skank… it's more like a… _Cena whore..._ than anything else." I instantly huffed at him, crossing my arms over my chest, using angry mannerisms as I refocused my eyes to look out the widow beside me.

I felt his hand come over to my side again, laying gently on my upper thigh, half on my skirt, half on the actual skin of my leg. I left a chill skip down over my back but I tried to ignore it and I damn sure didn't want him to notice it.

"You know I didn't mean it like that," he whispered, stopping at yet another red light. I still didn't look at him though as I tried not to focus on how hot his touch was causing my thigh to get.

I started it with him as a joke and he knew that obviously... But that last comment really did hurt a little. John knew how much emotion I put in the passion that I shared with him… _didn't he?_ But then again, if I never came out and told him I was in love with him how was he supposed to know the difference between just sex and… _making love?_

I sniffed a little, running a hand under my nose. Damnit, I didn't want to cry over this-- I didn't want him to see me cry over this. Honestly, I started it, it wasn't his fault... But I didn't want him to think of me like that either. That just made me sound so… _cheap_, like I was just another easy slut he took home after every show.

I looked down out of the corner of my eye as I felt him softly rub against my leg as the car starting moving again. I knew he was just trying to tell me he was sorry and comfort me, but I honestly wish he wouldn't touch me like that at the time being.

"I know," I whispered back, barely above a whisper as I tried to hide the breaks in my voice. A single tear slid down my face as I quickly tried to wipe it away before he noticed it.

I tried to clear my thoughts and wipe away any and all signs of tears as he pulled into the parking lot of the hotel to quickly find a space. We got out of the car and he grabbed our stuff from the back. He tucked my suitcase under his arm as he walked up beside me, moving towards the building. I felt bad that he had just fought this career-ending style match and now he was carrying over sixty pounds worth of luggage... but my feelings were still hurt.

He grabbed my hand again, lacing his fingers through mine as I pulled open the door with my other one. I could feel the heat radiate off his body from just being this close and I was still wearing his sweatshirt, it was that strong. I could only imagine what he would feel like with my bare skin pressed up against his right about now...

_Oh God… _maybe I am really just a whore for him... But it's not like it's my fault that he is the most gorgeous creature I had ever laid eyes on and it just so happened that I acted like a total nympho when I was around him. But honestly, somewhere along the line of our _very_ sexual relationship I had fallen for him, and I was definitely starting to think maybe Victoria was right.

* * *

I watched him from behind as he slipped the little plastic card into the door, pushing it open with his foot when the little flashy light turned green. He held it open for me, making room for my body to pass in front of him into the room. I went by silently, holding the back of my neck with my right hand to block eye contact but I could still feel his blue orbs burning a hole through me. 

I walked into the room, flipping the switch as the lamp beside the bed lit the room. He dropped my suitcase in the chair beside the table, throwing his bag on the floor like normal. He stood silently in front of the dresser mirror, watching me like a hawk through the reflection.

He just stood there, watching my every move and I tried to ignore it. His eyes made me do things no one else could... I unzipped my bag and threw a pair of his Chaingang boxers that I had stolen on the bed, followed by just a simple white wife-beater tank top; my normal sleeping attire.

I could sense he was doing his normal nightly routine now as I heard him take off his silver, white diamond Rolex and diamond incased dog-tags. He kicked off his shoes and socks at almost the same time that I slipped out of my high-heels. I walked over a little closer to the table by the window unhooking the white diamond earrings John had bought me for my birthday. I laid them down, along with my three silver rings. I took out the clip in my hair that had held up half of my curls. As my hair fell down around my shoulders I shook it out with my hands, leaning my head back a little. I thought I heard a growl escape from his lips as he was probably watching me again but I wasn't about to look at him, I hadn't since his little comment on the ride back.

I tossed my hair behind me to lay against my back as I raised his sweatshirt above my head, finally pulling it off; turning around my on heel I laid it over the back of the chair my suitcase sat in. No sooner had I turned around did I see John, less than ten inches in front of me, pulling his own white t-shirt off over his head, every muscle that could be seen contracted, revealing a body that most women only could dream about raking their fingernails over. I calmly turned back around, holding in my urge to jump him right then, right there. Sometimes I really hated the things he was capable of doing to me without even touching me.

I had just lifted my tiny black halter top over my head and threw it over on top of my suitcase, my back facing John, when I could feel him getting closer. I unhooked the diamond necklace I was wearing, trying not to act like I was interested in what he was doing at the moment. Damnit, I know had more self control than this, I swear to God I do...

I laid the necklace next to my other jewerly on the table trying to act as best I could like I didn't even notice that he was closing the gap between us. It wasn't till about the time I was reaching for my wife-beater, when I felt his hand on top of mine, his hard chest pushed up against my back, stopping me mid-air after I picked up the material in my hand.

"Don't," he whispered, as I dropped it back down on top of the bed. He twisted me around to face him, pulling my body into him flush up against his chest, the black lace from my bra rubbing against his pecks as I moved into his arms. I could feel his defined abs rubbing against my bare stomach which easily sent another chill over me. And if it wasn't for the mere fact he was still wearing his jean shorts, I'd probably be able to feel something else rubbing against my leg, as I often did at times like these.

I felt his hands around me at the zipper of my skirt; I pressed my cheek up against his shoulder, my lips touching his arm. When it fell to the floor he held on to me, steadying my balance as I stepped out of it, kicking it off to the side. He refocused on me as he reached up to put his index finger under my chin, forcing me to look up at him. The one pair of endless blue eyes that would make me scream the truth out of any lie and tell him whatever he wanted to know, no matter what the question stared back at me. I couldn't believe how much effect he had on me in such a short amount of time.

I watched him study my eyes as they searched for answers to questions he hadn't even verbally asked yet; although I think I knew what was on his mind. He brushed his hand against my jaw line, down my neck and onto my chest. I felt my body react to him all at once as I shook next to his. I accidentally let a tear slide down my cheek, but he instantly wiped it away with the pad of his thumb in one quick stroke.

"I'm sorry," he whispered again. "I didn't mean how that sounded earlier… it was meant as a joke and it just came out wrong and I'm sorry." I let my arms hang around on his hips, my fingers laced together as I noticed the sincere look on his face.

"It's okay… I made something outta nothing." He looked down at me a second longer before his lips crashed down on top of mine, locking them in for a dominance battle between his tongue and mine. It was sweet and gentle but at the same time I could feel the urgentance; the kind that took my breath away.

I released my arms from around his waist and brought them up to his face, wrapping one around his neck as the other ran through his short, spikey blonde hair. If WWE fans thought the kiss between Maria and his man was hot, they didn't know the half of it. He was the best kisser, ever, period. There was no debating with that. Maria and I have both testifided to that, but of course, it was no where near the ears of CM Punk.

He finally pulled back, giving me time to catch my breath as he started leading the small but always effective butterfly kisses down my neck, wrapping them under my jaw, going all the way down to my collar bone. I leaned my head back, granting him the instant access to more skin. He knew every place on my body that needed attention and every place that would get the biggest reaction; places I didn't even know existed until I started my relationship with him.

His hands slowly made their way up my back. I could feel the heat from them even though I was currently lost in the feeling of his physical manipulation from his lips. I always knew exactly where John Cena's hands were like I knew what the back of my hand looked like. He reached up for the clasp to my bra, picking it up off my back to take the two ends in each of his hands. He was just about to release them when I suddenly pulled away from him, his hands dropped out from behind me, his lips pulled away from my skin. He stared at me, confusion an obvious mark on his face.

"What?" He asked softly. I knew he would automatically think this had something to do with the whore comment but it honestly didn't. It had absolutely nothing to do with that... This was about us and it was really something I needed to do before… before _we_ progressed any further.

"What is it?" He asked me again, wanting to step forward and touch me again, I could tell. I pushed a piece of fallen hair out of my face, trying to figure out some coherent way to say this without making it so he wouldn't turn right around and walk out of that door behind him; my worst fear becoming reality.

"What's wrong, dollface?" He asked yet again, every time his voice getting a little more in depth with the question. I had never stopped him like that before, during foreplay or sex so he obviously knew something serious was going on with me. That, and he just knew me that well already, he could tell.

"I can't do this anymore John… I'm not, I can't..." I whispered to him, almost as if it were some top-secret, secret that no one but us could know at press time. He looked back at me, his eyes a little different than before; I think he was hurt from just hearing that come out of my mouth.

"What?" He started, pulling out his hand and locking it around mine as we stood at least three feet apart now. If this were any other night he would be staring directly at my body, half-dressed and vulnerable enough to be putty in his hands time and time again for the rest of the night... But not tonight, this couldn't happen without him knowing how I really felt in my heart. Victoria was right and that's all there is to it.

"John, I just _can't_ do this anymore," I repeated, as I started to feel tears in my eyes again. They were a little heavier than before, but nothing hysterical. I'd save that for when he actually did walk out on me after hearing what I had to say. I was absolutely scared out of my mind at the moment as he stood in front of me still completely oblivious to what was happening here. He squeezed my hand a little, rubbing against it with his thumb trying to calm me down.

"Baby, what? What are you talking about? …Are you trying to say you don't want to be with me anymore?" He asked, his voice soft, but obviously worried at the same time. I immediately shook my head no, closing my eyes as I felt the tears start to sting and overflow onto my cheek bones.

"No. No... that's not what I'm saying at all…" I choked, feeling him pull me back up against him, holding me in his arms again, his face buried against my neck.

"Then what? What is it? Just tell me. You know you can talk to me about anything..." His breath was hot against my skin as I put my hand up against his face, palm to cheek. I gently pulled him up to look at me again, his blue eyes full of an intensity I couldn't explain.

"I love what I have with you, this, us… everything; it's so important to me, it means _so_ much…" He stared to speak again and I pushed my index finger to his lips, shutting him up quickly. I needed my time to finish before he interjected. I had to get this off my chest.

"But at the same time, I know a relationship can't be all wild sex, partying and having someone to just travel down the road with… _John I love you..._ I'm completely head over heels for you and have been since the first time I met you… when you helped me see what kind of person I needed to be... But I can't keep doing this with you if all it's ever going to be is just another road story to add to your collection… I don't want to be just another notch in your bedpost." I tore my eyes and body away from his, holding my face in my hands. I sat down gently on the side of the bed that was thankfully right behind me.

I was too afraid to look up-- I was so sure if I did he would be gone. I was actually sitting there waiting for the sound of the door slamming shut to be completely honest, I was expecting it.

When all I heard after a few miserable minutes was silence was his heavy breathing I finally opened my eyes; I looked up to see him staring down at me, looking deeper into my eyes than he ever has. After only a few seconds of looking at him he hit his knees in front of me, putting his hands on either side of my body, flat against the bed, next to my knees. He lifted one hand to softly wipe the tears from my face, lifting my chin, forcing me to look back directly into his eyes.

"That's what this is all about?" He asked. "You don't think I love you just as much? I know the difference between ring-rat and girlfriend, no matter what anyone else thinks about me... I don't ask random chicks if they would like to date me, which could ultimately lead to something more like it almost did one time before." I knew he was referring to Elizabeth but I didn't say anything. I just let him continue.

"I asked you to be my **exclusive** girlfriend, meaning that I'm not seeing, touching or looking at anyone else. The only one I want to touch, look at or see is you... I broke a promise to myself when I met you, and that says a lot right there. I know I'm not the love-dovey romance kinda guy like I should be sometimes but that doesn't mean I don't love you. You're not even in the right ballpark for that..." He smiled, brushing his hand against my face again as I leaned into his touch.

"You're my dollface, and truthfully I love you too... and sometimes you even make me think that I never really loved Liz because our relationship never once felt like this... it never felt as real and as right as ours does. I'm sorry you ever felt like I didn't show it or if you actually thought that I would ever think of you as a _'Cena whore'_ like you were just some random ring rat." He brought both of his hands to cup around my face, pulling me so his lips could barely touch mine in a soft kiss.

"I may not express my emotions and my feelings like I should but I blame my father for that, it's just how I was raised. But, I do love you and you need not ever think any different. I promise... I should have told you before now-- I know, but I guess I was just scared of how you would react; obviously, I didn't have anything to worry about..."

All I could do was sit there and watch this gorgeous human being of a man, right in front of me, express his true feelings in a moment I couldn't even have imagined in my mind to be more perfect. I could tell by the look in his eyes and the soft expression on his face that he was telling the honest truth; that meant more to me than he would ever understand.

I knew from day one John wasn't the type of guy that was willing to let himself seem vulerable like that; to actually break him to the point where he admits thinking twice about a girl he was ready to marry is so much more than I ever expected to be able to accomplish. I never thought I would actually be able to cause John to let his guard down after the horrible situation he went through with her.

"John.. I.. I don't know what to say.." I whispered, actually at a loss for words for one of the first times in my whole life. I wasn't the type of person to become speachless over very many things, but this man made me feel like I had electricity running through my veins. He made me a better person altogether, something I had never experienced with anyone else.

I watched him as he slowly stood up again, but before he got all the way to his feet he stopped mid-way, wrapping his strong arm around me, cupping the back of my neck in his hand. I instantly felt his kiss against my lips as he pushed me against the bed gently; my back pressing against the comforter as he held me against him. He broke the kiss and reattached it in different areas on my body as he spoke in between.

"You-" _kiss _"don't-" _kiss _"have to-" _kiss _"say anything..." He whispered. His hot breath fell against my ear and his cheek pressed against mine. "Just tell me that you love me again... I want to hear it." His breath caused goosebumps to raise up on my arms as those words passed his lips. "I wanna hear you say it..." He breathed, gazing his teeth against my earlobe. I raked my nails up his ripped back, causing another goan to pull from his lips.

"I love you, John." I barely had enough time to get it out before my breath caught in my throat in a gasp. He pulled himself up again, holding his body above mine by pressing his hand into the matress beside my head. He smiled down at me, as my hands went straight for the buckle of his belt, unhooking it in what seemed like record time. I pulled it off, throwing it to the floor, as he stepped back to the floor to let them drop to the ground.

He kicked them off behind him as I sat up, pulling myself towards the edge of the bed. I sat on my knees as he came back towards me, tangling his hands in my hair as he kissed me again. Just laying it all on the line made this feel so much better; knowing he had said he loves me made every time he touched me that much more intense. Which was really hard to believe, knowing that we were incredible in bed together in the first place.

* * *

I laid there, watching his chest rise up and fall with every single breath he took. He held onto my hand, playing with my fingers as he laced them in between mine. Only a thin sheet covered us as we laid still, waiting until the sleep would finally fall over us at 3AM after three and half hours of amazing... _love-making._

I sighed contently, so glad I finally told John exactly how I felt and to know he felt the same way put a whole new feeling in the pit of my stomach. A small smile appeared on my face as I felt him brush the tip of his nose against my temple before placing a soft kiss there.

"Baby.." he whispered against me, his hot breath softly blowing into my ear causing my body to shiver a little. I felt his arms tighten around me as I smiled against his chest.

"Yeah?" I answered lightly, placing a light kiss just below his peck. I flet his fingertips slide up and down my arm as it laid over his waistline.

"I love you." I picked up my head to look up into his crystal eyes with a blush on my cheeks and my lips twisted into a sweet smile.

"I love you too, baby." I pressed my lips against his in a simple kiss but it quickly turned a little more passionate as he reached up to tangle his fingers in my hair, the same time as they cupped around my jawline. As he rolled over a little, lightly pushing me back in to the pillows around me I made a mental note to thank Victoria for allowing me to realize John Cena loved me just as much as I loved him.

* * *

**AN: Yes, I'm pretty much a WWE one-shot Queen & I whore for it, bad, lol.. One-shots are my fav. Obviously. Lemme know what you think! -Ash**


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